Friday, August 20, 2010

Attention Wal-Mart Shoppers

Attention Wal-Mart Shoppers:

Please be advised that there will be a mother and her four month old son shopping in our store this morning. As you see her half-sprinting through the aisles with a crazed look in her eyes, please step aside so she can get through the aisles. She is simply trying to compile all the items on her grocery list into her shopping basket in a timely manner.

Once she reaches the food section you will begin to hear loud crying and screaming coming from the green car seat she has perched in her shopping cart. Although the mother may look like she has everything under control, upon closer inspection one would notice the veins throbbing in her neck and the sweaty palms. Sympathetic looks and pleasant smiles will make her feel slightly better. Rude glares and mouths hanging open will only make her feel worse. (She really is trying to hurry.)

Please avoid the urge to approach the mother and inform her that the baby is hungry. He is not. He simply does not like grocery shopping. Also avoid the urge to peer into the little boys car seat and ooohh and ahhh at him. You are not helping and you are slowing the mother down. This is especially pertinent to people with bad breath and smell of cigarettes.

To the cashier who will be ringing up the mothers groceries; do not make idle chit chat. Keep your head down and scan as fast as you possibly can. Pretend that ringing up groceries is an Olympic sport. The mother, baby, and all Wal-Mart patrons within a hundred foot radius will appreciate you the faster you work.

Last but not least, do not reprimand the mother for not returning her shopping cart to the cart corral. She knows the quicker she gets home and takes the baby out of the car seat, the happier he will be. She will resume the courteous cart returning chore when her son is older.

Thank you!

Sunday, August 15, 2010

Nothing Tastes As Good As Skinny Feels!

As most of my fellow readers know, last year I began dieting with two goals in mind. Either to reach a certain weight or to be able to fit back into a certain pair of jeans I own. Well, today for the heck of it, I decided to try on those jeans. Greg was watching me from our bed as I pulled them out of the closet. As soon as I pulled them over my hips, his eyes got big and he said, "Whoa! They went past your ass!" Last time I tried to put them on they wouldn't even go that far!! The final kicker was to see if I could get them buttoned. And....I could!!! I'm not sure who is more excited! Me or Greg! Did I mention they were his favorite jeans?

You may be wondering how a woman who just had a baby four months ago is able to fit back into jeans that she was dieting to get into prior to conception. Well, let me just tell you how I did it!

1. I'm breastfeeding.

2. As crazy as this sounds, I swear while I was pregnant my stomach shrank. I was so sick during my pregnancy that keeping food down was impossible. Therefore, I didn't eat as big of portions since I knew I'd be throwing it right up. Basically, life pre-baby I could eat as much as Greg. I'm not kidding. Life post baby, I honestly just can't eat that much!

3. I take Parker out for a walk at least five days a week!

4. We are no longer traveling and I no longer live in a fifth wheel. Living in such a confined space was just not healthy for Greg or myself. It's amazing how much of a workout living in a normal house provides a person! I'm constantly going up and down stairs and just staying busy in general trying to keep a semi-tidy house!

To celebrate, I think I'm going to buy a new pair of jeans!

Friday, August 13, 2010

4 months old!

My sweet little boy is 4 months old today! I cannot believe how fast time is flying. In case you don't remember, one of my 2010 goals is to get my pictures all organized and labeled. I can't say that I've accomplished this goal (yet), but I have been pretty good about printing all the pictures since Parker has been born! Yesterday I finally took the time to finish labeling all of the pictures I had of Parker and I put them in a cute newborn album his Aunt Jennifer sent him. Looking back at the pictures I took just a few months ago was amazing! I cannot believe how much he has changed in such a short amount of time. I thought he was an adorable, cute, handsome baby when he was born, but now I think he's even cuter!!! I seriously think he could be the next Gerber baby! (Then again, I'm sure every mom thinks that about her infant!)

As usual, Parker had a busy third month of life! He met his Aunt Sheila, Uncle Andy, and cousins James and Magdalene. He sat in his high chair for the first time, which we have discovered he loves! I now place him in it every night so he can "eat dinner" with us! He is lasting longer in his Bumbo chair! He does awesome at holding his head up and everyone tells us so!! He began laughing! And, he is trying VERY HARD to roll over. Also, his hair is continuing to grow! No matter what I do it sticks up on the side and half the time it's sticking up on the top too! I'm beginning to wonder if 4 months is going to be the month I'll start breaking out hair products on him! (Maybe I'll ask the doctor if that's OK first. I'm sure he'll think I'm crazy!) I can't give a height and weight update because his 4 month appointment is on Monday. Believe me that drives me crazy because I've had him weighed and measured the 13th of every month since he's been born. I'm trying to tell the control freak in me that a few extra days are not that bad and I can be patient. However, I can tell he's already growing out of his size 2 diapers! This past month he began taking naps in his crib. I made the mistake of constantly putting him in his swing after I nursed him and that seemed to be where he napped the best. I figured I needed to nip this in the bud, so to speak, so it's been a constant challenge these past few weeks for me to find a way to get him to like his crib. I started putting him in the crib when he was asleep, only for him to wake up 5 minutes later screaming his head off. I finally figured out the trick! I have to swaddle him like he's going to sleep (go figure), I have to play a lullabye that continuously plays, and I have to ROCK HIM while he is still wide awake. I put that in caps because I felt like such a dork afterwards! Of course a baby would want to be rocked to sleep! DUH!

So there you have it! I'm excited to see what his fourth month has in store! In the meantime, enjoy these pictures!

I'm officially 4 months old!

***check back for more pics. blogger is being stupid.***

Monday, August 9, 2010

Gifts From Another Country

My sister and her family recently moved to China. As much as it sucks for her to live half way across the world from me, there is one small perk. When she visits, she brings me cool things! They recently came to the States for a quick visit and she brought along some pretty awesome gifts! Now, help me out. I know there is a word for gifts that people buy their friends when they go on vacation. But for the life of me I can't think of what it is. So, I'm just going to refer to these as, "Gifts From Another Country".

First and foremost, she brought me...FOOD! Check out all these goodies! We love the Pocky and what's funny is the Asian section at my local Wal-Mart carries these! I may have to start including them on my grocery list. Also, something I found very odd, but very yummy, were their Ritz crackers. They actually take two crackers and sandwich them with chocolate or lemon cream! Unbelievable!

The other gift she brought over is something that I can't believe hasn't become a trend here in the U.S.A. I'm not sure what they are called, so I'll use the pictures below to demonstrate!

Those little socks basically made my "sexy" shoes into "super sexy" shoes! Now I just need an excuse to get dolled up and try them out for real!!!

P.S. I finally realized what that word was that I couldn't remember. But just for fun, do you know what it was? I'll give you a hint: it starts with an "S"!